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Spike Milligan Quotes / Quotations


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Spike Milligan QUOTES / QUOTATIONS
A sure cure for seasickness is to sit under a tree.
Quotation of Spike Milligan
All I ask is the chance to prove that money can't make me happy.
Quotation of Spike Milligan
And God said, 'Let there be light' and there was light, but the Electricity Board said He would have to wait until Thursday to be connected.
Quotation of Spike Milligan
And God said, Let the earth bring forth grass, and the earth brought forth grass and the Rastafarians smoked it.
Quotation of Spike Milligan
Are you going to come quietly, or do I have to use earplugs?
Quotation of Spike Milligan
Contraceptives should be used on all conceivable occasions.
Quotation of Spike Milligan
Contraceptives should be used on every conceivable occasion.
Quotation of Spike Milligan
For ten years Caesar ruled with an iron hand. Then with a wooden foot, and finally with a piece of string.
Quotation of Spike Milligan
How long was I in the army? Five foot eleven.
Quotation of Spike Milligan
I can speak Esperanto like a native.
Quotation of Spike Milligan
I have the body of an eighteen year old. I keep it in the fridge.
Quotation of Spike Milligan
I shook hands with a friendly Arab. I still have my right arm to prove it.
Quotation of Spike Milligan
I spent many years laughing at Harry Secombe's singing until somebody told me that it wasn't a joke.
Quotation of Spike Milligan
I thought I'd begin by reading a poem by Shakespeare, but then I thought, why should I? He never reads any of mine.
Quotation of Spike Milligan
I'm a hero with coward's legs.
Quotation of Spike Milligan
I'm not afraid of dying I just don't want to be there when it happens.
Quotation of Spike Milligan
In India a farmhand was caught in the act with his cow. He said he had bad eyesight and thought it was his wife.
Quotation of Spike Milligan
Is there anything worn under the kilt? No, it's all in perfect working order.
Quotation of Spike Milligan
It was a perfect marriage. She didn't want to and he couldn't.
Quotation of Spike Milligan
It's all in the mind, you know.
Quotation of Spike Milligan
Money can't buy you happiness but it does bring you a more pleasant form of misery.
Quotation of Spike Milligan
Money couldn't buy friends, but you get a better class of enemy.
Quotation of Spike Milligan
Money couldn't buy friends, but you got a better class of enemy.
Quotation of Spike Milligan
My Father had a profound influence on me, he was a lunatic.
Quotation of Spike Milligan